Why put my writing out into the world? Why would anyone want to hear what I have to say?
I’m been hearing this question more lately, both from you in emails about starting blogs and writing book proposals, and (let’s be honest here) in my own head. So let’s talk it out a bit.
When I first started writing about food, I think it was the universality that drew me in. We all have to eat, and talking about dinnertime or picky kids or food shopping–these are such good windows into the parts of our lives we all have in common. I think this is one reason food blogging is so popular–because we can always connect over food and the ways we interact with it in our lives. As different as you and I might be from one another, we can sit down and laugh about the hurricane of grumpy kids and dinner ruts and everything else that hit our kitchen last night in the hour before dinner.
But there is a trap that comes with this magical universality. If I write, and you read and you find your experience in the words, then hooray! But if I start trying to write for you, pushing our commonalities to the center of my story, and, most of all, assuming that you are just like me, then I’ve fallen into the trap. I always know when I’m there my fingers get heavy on the keyboard and I start fantasizing about forgetting this whole writing thing and opening a bakery instead.
So how do I get out of that trap?
I think about how although we’re a little bit the same, mostly we’re different. Yes, we all have to eat, but we have different families, kitchens, grocery stores, incomes, bodies, attitudes about food, allergies, preferences, histories, amounts of time to make dinner, priorities, gardens, and things we find funny. And you might think your little bits of detail are are boring because they’re just like everyone else’s, but they’re not boring OR like anyone else’s. They are only yours, and those odd bits are what make your story.
So why you? Well for one, if you’re already writing your own story in your head, you might as well get it down. I hear so much about “voice” and “authenticity,” but I’m not sure those are aspects we have to find–I think they might just be heady ways of talking about writing the story that’s only yours and holding back on using the delete button too much. And if you can find any way to send those words out into the world, why not just send them out? You have no idea what will come of it, but at the very least you will have written something, which is, I imagine, exactly what you set out to do, right? So however it lands, you win.
Yes?
Anne Lamott also has a lot to say on this subject (and many others). Thanks for your thoughtful words.
I’m not a food writer, but I do like to write about my clients and how I see life…LOVE that you put this into words…a good perspective to remind myself OFTEN of! 🙂
How do you even get started writing a blog? I’m starting to think I would like to. And how do people find out about it?? Will anyone read my words? :0)
I just started blogging myself! It can be a lot of work. Before you decide where to set your blog up, consider your goals. Do you want to make money? Do you just want to post once per week, and want a free option? Then, pick a name and a host. After a few days of research, I went with bluehost and wordpress.
Thanks for the advice! I will look into it.
Yes- on top of what Jennifer said. I’d add… just start! I’m on WordPress, but there are so many platforms that are super user friendly, it really just takes a few minutes to get up and running. And in the beginning, I wouldn’t think about readers at all, just work on how it feels to be writing there.
I love this post…especially about falling into “the trap.” I feel it in the same way when that starts to happen.
It’s so interesting that you posted this and I just came to my computer this morning and thought I’d check my favorite blogs…I’ve been considering blogging for a while now, but thought no one would want to read what I have to say. Could it be that you were speaking directly to me? Thank you for your comments.
This is lovely, a nice warm blanket to cuddle in as I soothe my frustrations away. I’ve been considering quitting blogging as there seem to be more and more “rules” hemming in author-bloggers. Do this! Don’t do that! Visit this many blogs a day and leave meaningful, deep, witty comments on each one or you’ll never sell any copies of your book! But don’t ever talk about your book, that’s rude! Eventually I ask myself WHY am I doing this – to promote me, or to make connections with other people?
Your post reminds me of why I started blogging, and why I will continue – not to increase sales, but to actually communicate with others.
I think that’s one of the keys. I’ve had a public food blog and a personal one, and I couldn’t keep up on both, so the personal one where I keep a record of my family for my posterity won out. Writing my food blog, I also felt like I was starting to write for the wrong (wrong for me) reasons. I am a writer; that’s why I write. I write for pay, professionally. But I started doing that for one reason–I love it. I think it’s like any other job (including parent, speaking for myself)–if you love it, truly love it, you will keep going. Not without any rough spots, but you’ll be drawn back in by your own passion.
I agree completely. Also, assuming that one writes because one enjoys writing, as soon as one is writing for popularity, approval, acceptance and all those other ephemeral teases, the writing is no longer fun.
Maybe if you write what you want, what you love, what you know with your truest voice, you won’t be as popular as the writer who appeals to the greater crowd, but you will always (or most always) love your craft and your practice. And that is good.
xo
Communicating, and Community, is at the heart of our being, I believe. When you speak from that true center, what you say will resonate with most of your readers. We learn and grow from this process. I tend to refine my ideas by talking about them, developing them, making them better as I go along. It’s such a gift we offer to each other. I really appreciate your “thinking” type of musings: I pick up the ball and carry it further! Thank you.
Definitely, definitely yes. I have become a much more relaxed, happier blogger since letting go of what I think I “should” be writing about and writing what I want to write about.
Thank you for reminding me that the whole reason I started a blog was to share my excitement about things I discover. I will make sure to keep this at the front of my mind next time I sit to write.
… great discussion, just wanted to add: what a photo! Rosie!
Thank you, I write poetry mostly for myself and I’d been deciding lately whether it was worth writing. Thank you for sharing and encouraging
Hello Alana! This afternoon, I found myself browsing the shelves of a bookstore for a cookbook to add to my ever-growing collection. I came across “The Homemade Pantry” and fell in love instantly. I proceeded to spend the rest of my afternoon sitting barefoot on my back porch, accompanied by two fuzzy cats, reading your cookbook cover-to-cover. I love the conversational way you write… I adore the photo’s… and I cannot wait to try the recipes. (I’m also excited to announce that after reading your section on canning, I feel brave enough to give it a try on my own! So once blueberry season hits here in New England, I will definitely be tackling one of my greatest cooking fears). 🙂 Thank you for sharing your wonderful recipes!! I’m sure that I’ll now be a regular reader of your blog as well.
Oh Nicole, I feel very lucky to have been part of such a good afternoon. 🙂 Thank you so much for sharing it with me.
Dearest Alana,
This is gorgeous. Last weekend at #womensvoicesforachange at Skidmore, I led a 2 day Salon about Authentic Voices and Social Media. We talked about connecting with what is authentic and unique to us as individuals and the value of letting that quality be in the world. Thank you for stating ‘why’ with such grace and eloquence. xo S
As a new food blogger, I really appreciated this post. Thanks for putting it out there.